Further to my most recent post: Mind your own body, I found a lot more hilarious pregnancy comebacks online. The sassier the better, really. I’ve compiled my favourites below, and here are links to the full articles from Pregnant Chicken: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three.
- I know!! It’s like I’m growing a whole baby or something!
- Holy shit, you too!
“Feeling fat yet?”
- Whoa, I was just going to ask you the same thing. How weird is that?!
- That’s right. Feelin’ phat with a “ph”, Hooker.
- You feelin’ lucky, Punk?
“You better sleep now because once that baby gets here…”
- Why!? Don’t they sleep?! Next you’ll tell me they poop too.
“How are you going to handle another one?!”
- We’re selling the oldest one on eBay.
- Oh, it will be fine. I drink a little.
- I just won’t pick this one up when it cries. I figure that will free up a lot of my time.
“You should NOT be drinking caffeine.”
(or doing, eating, touching, etc. something else that’s none of their damn business).
- You shouldn’t be wearing those jeans (etc.) but I didn’t bring that to your attention.
- It’s not caffeine. It’s doctor prescribed laxative tea because this pregnancy is making me so constipated I have hemorrhoids. Oh, sorry, was that too much information?
- You’re right, tequila is better.